The What-If Game

Did you play that game as a kid? You know, What if we were driving and ran into a ditch and everybody died?! What if I borrowed your hammer and DIDN'T leave it in the tree?!. What if I eat all the food on my plate and it makes me puke.?! What if a policeman pulled you over and he's NOT a NICE one?! We used to play ALL the time as kids, especially Kyle. It drove Dan NUTS! Now it drives ME nuts. I HATE it! But for the last few minutes, I've been sitting here playing it with myself. That's even worse. I'm not even annoying anybody with it. It's just going on in my own head.

What if I screw her up? What if I screw him up? What if I just suck as a mom?

The boys had t-ball tonight. Since my judge is gone and I've been able to pick the kids up from school and be home early, I decided I'd take Kylee to the movies while the boys were gone. A chick flick. Just us. Mom and me. But we didn't...as punishment. Ugh?!

What if I should have taken her anyway?! What if I should have TOTALLY handled that differently?!

Kylee is getting to that age. I know it's just beginning, but I want to nip as much as I can in the bud as soon as I can. When you tell her to do something, she does it when SHE feels like it. If you tell her again, she'll say, "Sorry! Sorry!" Move as long as you're watching. Turn your back, she's PROBABLY NOT doing what you told her.

As I was driving them home from school, I told them they had about 45 minutes to have a snack and rest and then we were getting started on homework. About 4:15, I said the them, "Ok. Let's do homework." Blaine went and got his backpack while he explained he didn't have very much. She ignored me. As I set Blaine up at the table to do his, I said, "Kylee, I said it's time to do your homework." She said, "Give me five minutes."

What if I had said no?! What if I had told her to do it now?!?

I didn't. I decided to keep my mouth shut and teach her a lesson. Blaine did started his homework, finished his homework, went to play. It's been WELL over five minutes at this point, and, of course, she's NOT doing her homework. So I say again, "Kylee, it's time to do your homework." "Mom, ten more minutes, PLEASE!"

What if I hadn't just walked away?! What if I had TOLD her we were going to the movies and THAT'S why she needed to get it done?!

I didn't answer. I walked away.

When Joey got home, he packed Blaine up to go to t-ball. Now the movie is in 10 minutes. No way for her to get her homework done. The boys leave. I say to her, "Go get your homework done right now." "Mom, I hate homework. I don't WANT to do my homework!"

What if I had said, "It's part of life, dear. Go get it done so we can go to the movies."?! What if I had just kept my mouth shut and not even TOLD her we were goign to the movies?!

I said, "Kylee, you need to get it done. I've been telling you for over an hour to start it, and you have been ignoring me. The reason I wanted you to start it an hour ago is because I was going to take you to the movies at 5:30. But you've ignored me, and I'm tired of you ignoring me. Go get your homework done." She flips. Cries. Screams. I say, "Go to your room and compose yourself before you not only don't get to go to the movies but you get your butt busted." She screams, "YOu should have TOLD me! I would have done it! You should have told me you were taking me to the movies!" I said, "You should have done as I asked WHEN I asked you..not because there were special priviledges, but because it's right and you know it's right."

She RUNS to her room, crying ... no SOBBING. I stuck to my guns. She's GOT to learn to do what she's told WHEN she's told......right?

What if I had MADE her do it like I normally do?! What if I had just said, "Go get it done becuase we're going to the movies!"? What if......